Math Autobiography

I really like math. I miss doing math. I don't know why I don't do more of it in my spare time. 

I do not remember a lot of specifics from my K-6 mathematics classes, but what I do remember was generally positive, and I predict that positivity exists because I was "good" at it. When I attempt to envision what my mathematical experiences involved during primary/elementary grades, I conjure up images of manipulatives and numbers on a chaulkboard. I remember those little multicoloured blocks intended for describing place values. I never liked those blocks, I found it easier to just visualize the numbers and write them down. 

I remember "mad minutes" for multiplication, and sometimes even the dreaded division. I didn't mind practicing the multiplication tables but to this day I don't quite understand why it's so important to be able to recite them so fast. My third grade teacher would reward the first three students to complete the task. When I think about this now all that comes to mind is an image of the last child to pass in their mad minute --with possibly every question correct-- feeling downtrodden and embarrassed. This concept is something I see as an issue in math assessment. From my own experience(and, I can imagine, the experience of many others) math assessment = math tests. Math tests are stressful. I've always had a lot of confidence in my mathematical ability but I still remember sitting next to an open window waiting to enter the gymnasium for my Math 1000 final exam, trying not to pass out from nervousness.  

If I thought I had the answers for the problems on that test and I felt that way, I can only imagine how someone who was struggling was feeling.

I haven't taken a math course in a while and surprisingly often think about how I miss it. In university I've taken Math 1000 and 1001, two linear algebra courses (for fun), and two introductory stats courses (as electives). I interact with math in my life as much as any average person I suppose, but not in any real major way. 

So, I like math. However, I'm not even remotely confident in my abilities to communicate mathematical concepts to others, especially children. I'm eager to learn what I can and start preparing myself for that.